June 20, 2009

Shopping for Bolts

Any one who reads this blog knows that I have a very handy husband. Which I have to admit is, well, handy. (It is nice to know that at least I think I am funny, right?) There is one little draw back to my handy husband. He does not like to go to the hardware store alone. He insist on company, bored, incompetent company, is better in his book than no company.

I have tried many a ways to squirm out of the hardware store. He continues to persist in the insistence that I go with him. I have no idea why. Below is a conversation that we have all the time.

Brent: I need to pick up some bolts at the hardware store.

Me: Okay, I will see you when you get back.

Brent: You need to come with me.

Me: (Knowing that I can resist but resistance is futile) Okay (said in such a way to let him know it is anything but okay)

At the Hardware store:

Me: (Leaning on the cart in the bolt aisle wondering why there is a whole entire aisle dedicated to bolts. Thinking I would hate to be the employee responsible for sorting those bolts and also wondering how you even know which bolt you are suppose to buy for what kind of project.)

Brent: I need a doo hicky bolt to be blah blah long so that I can make sure that blah blah blah is installed right

Me: All right

Brent: Do you think this will work?

Me: Ummm . . . sure

Brent: I don't think it will blah blah blah blah correctly.

Me: Okay, so not that one.

Brent: How about this one?

Me: Isn't that the same one you just showed me?

Brent: No this one is blah blah blah. So what do you think?

Me: Sure that looks good to me.

Brent: Let me look at one more thing maybe it will be better.

Me: (Eye Roll, eye roll, eye roll but he is not paying attention to me. He is totally absorbed in the 1 trillion different bolts their purpose, size, shape, blah blah blah)

Brent: (Thirty Minutes later) So I think this one will work we will take it home and try it and if it doesn't work we can bring it back.

Me: (Having no idea what the bolt is even for) Oh, I'm sure that is the right one there is no need for us to bring it back. I'm positive you can get that one to work.

Hence my life as the wife of a handy husband. It isn't all glamour I have to work very hard for all the projects he does so well. I have wondered why in dress shops they have chairs for men to sit in and wait for their wives but there are no chairs in hardware stores for wives. Maybe next time we are at the hardware store I will have to drop a suggestion.

I know there will be a next time because Brent is thinking he needs a different kind of bolt.


Me, Myself and I said...

Great idea about the benches. They absolutely should have big huge comfy bright orange lazy boy "wife" chairs in that manly tool store. Massaging chairs, yes yes. With half dressed men who feed you grapes. Men like the ones Cristy has experience with (according to book club...)

Angie said...

Totally agree with the chair idea. Random side note. On first glance, I thought you wrote "Any one who reads this blog knows that I have a very randy husband" instead of "handy". Now THAT would have been an interesting post. ;)

4kidsandcrazy said...

Just can't relate to husband needing me at the hardware store. If you want WWIII just put the two of us in a hardware store together.

I'm so impressed that you go. I think I'd just tell him to get over it and go buy his bolts.